Oops!

I know I know..... I haven't posted since last year! I'm going to do better!!! I will do better! There are so many things I'd like to share with you! A lot has been going on and a lot has been happening!!!

My oldest son has started school! Bubby (nickname) absolutely loves it! His language has blossomed into so much more than what we were hoping! It's been utterly fantastic. He loves to play with the other students and do the activities they have. Every day when he comes home he has to show me what picture he painted or colored that day. Excitement doesn't even come close to how this child is about school. We do have our challenges though. He is quite stubborn and can be hard headed at times. Sometimes he doesn't want to follow the rules or teacher's direction. Potty training is also a big  issue we are currently working on finding a solution for. He is learning something every day and it just amazes me. He has also figured out how to write the first two letters in his name. Can we say proud mommy moment?!?!?!?! Bubby is growing up so fast and becoming quite the little man of the house.

My second child is quite the anomaly all on her own! I call her my fairy child. She has her own uniqueness about her. Back in October Fairy-girl was diagnosed with Autism. Needless to say it was a bit of a shock, but me and the hubs have learned how to cope with things. We have a few friends who's children also have Autism and they've been a great support system and helping us through this new venture. She's grown so much since last year. She's active and always so happy. Nothing phases this child. She's completely happy to just go with the flow. She still has trouble in social situations and different food textures are a real problem we are working on, but all in all she's such a bright light that just glows wherever she is. One of our favorite things to do is just walk. She loves sitting in the stroller and hanging out with me. Being outside seems to calm her down and she's just so at peace with things. She's my sweet Fairy-girl!

As far as the hubs and myself, well we're still here! Things are going good in the household! Sure, we have our ups and downs. We have our stresses and joys but we are happy. I love him more and more every day and every day without fail he tells me he loves me. One BIG piece of news we have is we will soon add a 3rd child to our family!!!!! I am currently 12 weeks pregnant and things on that side are going great. Of course the kiddos don't really understand yet but knowing them they will be excited!

During the past few months some people have come into our lives that have truly blessed us. The Lord knew we needed good people in our lives and put people who have helped us out in so many ways. We can say that we are so thankful for the things that have happened. Is stress gone, no, but it's been eased.

One big thing I am starting that I am SO EXCITED to share with you all is one of our newest "plans" so to speak. Since we have been blessed with so much kindness the only way to repay that kindness is to "pay if forward". We are going to be starting operation "Kindness Month by Month". The plan is to do one random act of kindness a month. We don't have a lot but we are going to do what we can so we can pay the kindness forward. If we are able to do more than one act we will. The minimum though is one per month. This months Kindness act is we plan to leave coloring books and crayons at our clinic's waiting room for the smaller kids. Does it sound like much no, but it will be beneficial for the parents and the clinic staff so the kids are occupied for a few minutes until the doctor calls them to be seen. As the acts are done we'll post pictures and I'll share on my Facebook and this blog. I hope you'll pick up the Kindness Month by Month as well! I'm more than happy to have help in spreading the love!

With so much going on I'm not sure how much I'll post per month but I'm going to do my best! There is a lot happening right now that I'm wanting you all to know about. There are situations that we are going through that you may relate to. I hope to hear from you with your suggestions and advice. Even though I'm already a mom with 2 children and one on the way I still don't know what I'm doing half the time!

Thank you to all of you for stopping by the blog! We'll all go on adventures together!

"No man is a failure who has friends." -Clarence Odbody

There are many things that come with being a part of the military. You have to move all the time, deal with rules and codes, learn how to speak military lingo, figure out how to run a family on your own at times, and the worst is saying goodbye. Saying goodbye in the military has many meanings. The worst meaning is saying goodbye to your spouse after they don't come home from war. I personally think that a close second to that is saying goodbye to the friends you make. You never know when you'll see them again because you never know where you'll be stationed at. I had to say goodbye to a good friend of mine this evening. As a matter of fact I just came from a dinner with a bunch of us to wish her farewell. This. Is. Hard. She was the first person who I would become friends with during my Germany adventures. She has been there for me through a whole lot. I have been there for her through a whole lot. We've been there for each other for many things. Drama with other stupid people, drama between ourselves, being there when our children were born, birthdays, holidays, weekends, dinners, phone calls, walks around housing, etc. You don't make friends when you become a part of the military, you extend your family. She has definitely become a part of my family. Her kids have become a part of my family. My heart is breaking because I know that first thing in the morning she wont call me just so we can listen to each other make breakfast for our kids and do our morning routines over the phone. I won't be able to talk to her about her latest blonde moment. She won't be here to give me support when I need it most. This. Is. Hard. Sure we'll be able to talk over Facebook and what-not but it's not the same. I won't have the comfort of knowing that she is across the street when I need her. A part of my family is leaving and who knows when i'll see her again. Hopefully it's sooner rather than later. I hope she knows that even though we've both had our share's of ups and downs I am truly thankful that she came into my life. My time here in Germany would not have been the same without her and I know I would not have met the people I have if it weren't for her. I am thankful to call her my friend. It breaks my heart that she is leaving but that is one of the downfalls of military life. We have to learn that we aren't always going to be in the same place for long. We have to make as much of the time together that we have. I think that me and her have had a pretty good time in the (almost) 3 years here. I do have comfort knowing that no matter where the military takes me she will be somewhere out there in the world and will be there for me when I need her. I will have that friend out there who loves me. That gives me comfort and a sense of peace about her leaving. She will be hopping on a plane in the next couple of days. I hope that she has a safe flight and the kids don't give her a whole bunch of problems. I know she will be super duper happy to be home. It's all she's talked about for the past 2 months!!!! I am happy for her because it's tough being away from family. I'm happy I had the chance to make a new family over here and thankful she was willing to accept my crazy self. More of my friends are leaving in the next few months and I am going to be going through tons of tears and heartbreak with each and every one of them. I am not looking forward to it. I do know that wherever the military takes each of us we will still be connected. I am leaving soon and I will be kicking and screaming on my way to the plane. I don't want to leave the friends I know will still be here. The good thing is I will always have them in my life and I also have the chance to make new friends wherever we go next. I get to extend my family even further. I am blessed. I will miss her terribly. Treasure your friends ya'll. The quote I put as the title says it all.

New Year's Resolutions...

It's that time of year again, the time when we all make our New Year's resolutions!! I'm sure you all have your lists ready so that way when the big ball drops you'll have goals to look forward too. I've been thinking long and hard about my list this up-coming year. Every year I do the same old thing... "lose weight", "eat better", "no soda", "save more money". All of those are probably on your list as well, or at least something similar. As I was thinking about those things I realized that I wanted to go further instead of doing the usual lists. I wanted to make a resolution list I knew I could attempt and have some sort of success with. It's always a fresh start with a new year and I'm hoping that this new year will be a big one for me.

**2012 Resolutions**
-Get closer to God.
-Get closer to my husband.
-Get closer to my children.
-Learn how to knit and crochet.
-Read more with my children.
-Try more new recipes instead of the old ones.
-Learn how to successfully lose weight the smart way.
-Be a better friend.
-Sing when I get the chance.
-Smile at least once a day, even if for no reason.
-Find something good in every day.
-Be happier with my life and beat my depression.
-Be a better mother to my children.
-Volunteer more when and where I can.
-Do more activities with my children.
-Take better care of myself.
-Try at least once new haircolor that no one is expecting.
-Give hugs every chance I get to those that mean something to me.
-Figure out some exercise routine.
-Tell people how much they mean to me every chance I get.
-Learn how to relax when it comes to my children and their learning process.
-Not be so scared to try new things.
-Do more things homemade than store bought.
-Get a manicure and pedicure.
-Get a tattoo.
-Go on a date with my husband at least once a month.
-All around be a better person through God.

I'm going to do my best in 2012 to hold up to my resolutions. They don't seem that far out of reach. Hopefully 2012 will be a wonderful year for me and my family!! I wish you all the best for 2012!!!!!

Life goes on....

Well, it's been almost a week since I found out about the passing of a precious baby boy, Corbin. I cannot begin to understand what it's like to lost a child and to be honest, I don't want to know. The day I found out I cried. I cried for Ruth, for Cody, for Colt, for their families, for the friends, for the people who would never get to meet him, for everyone in his life. I cried because as a mother myself this was just heartbreaking. I cried because it hit so close to home. I cried because I actually knew someone who had lost a child. I cried a lot that day. After I read about what happened I picked up my kids and hugged them tight. Guinevere got mad and Malachi thought I had went nuts. I thank the Lord for giving me healthy kids. All that day I just cried and mourned the loss of a precious life. The next day I woke up feeling guilty. How could I have such healthy kids and Ruth just lost hers? I honestly felt guilty for having healthy kids. I thought if my kids were sick I could relate to her more and maybe understand a little better. I just wanted to be back home and with Ruth to help them out. Then my kids woke up. I started to cry knowing that Corbin wouldn't wake up. I fixed them breakfast and started to cry. Ruth wouldn't be feeding Corbin breakfast this morning.  All morning I was a huge well of tears. Every little thing my kids did made me think if Corbin and how he would never do that. I got mad that such a little life was taken. Then they went down for their naps that afternoon. I sat down and all of a sudden I started laughing. I noticed some blocks built in a tower in the middle of the floor that my son had done. I was to depressed and felt to guilty all morning to notice that he had built that tower. I hadn't seen him do that before. I felt proud then. My son had built this tower! YAY!!!! Then I thought, we have to keep building. We have to keep moving on. My kids didn't know this tragedy had happened, yet they went on. They learned new things. Then I laughed again because I knew if Ruth found out how I was acting she would kick me in the butt! When my kids woke up that afternoon from their naps they both gave me hugs. In those hugs I felt a bit of peace. Yes, this awful thing had happened but we all learned so much and gained so much from it. I had never known about Williams Syndrome before this. As I passed along their story more people learned about Williams Syndrome. Awareness for this disease was raised. Yes he was here only a short time but in that short time he made a HUGE impact in the world. I played with my kids that afternoon and evening knowing that Corbin was ok. The doctors did an operation on him to heal his heart. His heart did get healed. It may not have been the way we all wanted but it did get healed at last. Putting my kids to sleep that night I prayed that I could teach them something about Corbin. Maybe not today, nor tomorrow but someday I hope I can. I went to bed feeling a lot better about what had happened. Corbin was up in heaven looking down on us with a perfect heart. I knew that he wouldn't want us to dwell on the sadness of his death. He would want us to focus on the positive. Hopefully more people are educated on Williams Syndrome now that this story has been shared. 

In the few days since then I still feel a bit of sadness every now and then. There is a special place in my heart for a little boy whom I have never met. His story will always stick with me. The strength of his mother and father will always amaze me. The days have passed but his memory is forever. My son has learned a few new words in the past few days. My daughter has taken 3 steps by herself! I like to think that maybe Corbin is helping them along. I know he's helping me. As I am writing this my daughter is playing and figuring out how a toy works. My son is eating breakfast and smiling. Life does go on, we just have to figure out how to take what has happened and make it a part of us, hopefully for the better.

Ruth, you are an amazing mother. You have dealt with more than anyone should have to. You have shown such strength and courage and love. I hope I am as wonderful mother to my kids as you are to your boys. Thank you for sharing your story and journey. I know it's not over for you yet and I hope you know if you need anything feel free to ask. In the days coming though I hope some sense of peace is restored to you and your family. Corbin is so special and he has touched so many. Thank you for letting us be a part of it. We'll be wearing red and green (my daughter doesn't have anything red) on Monday in support and releasing a balloon. 

In Memory...

Corbin,
I want you to know that you have taught me many things in these past 3 months. Faith, Hope, Strength, Courage have all been a part of that. I think the biggest thing though is how to Fight. How to Fight for the right reasons and not to give up. Determination in getting there. Perseverance in during the Fight. You were much much much stronger in your 3 months than I have been in my 24 years. Reading about your journey has touched me to the deepest part of my soul. I will never forget your struggle. I will never forget your journey. You brought such joy to so many people, your mom and dad in particular. I hope you know your mother is an amazing person. She has kept her footing so firm throughout this whole ordeal. I have no idea how she did it. It amazes me that she can be so sturdy in a time of fear. I wish I had that. If it were me, and I were in her shoes I would have lost it a long time ago, but she didn't. I think you get that Strength from her. Your dad is a good man. I don't know him personally but I have seen how he has been there for your mother. I know he's hurting and he'll show is pain in a different way than your mom, but know little Peanut that he himself has shown a lot of Strength as well. Corbin your brother has no clue what is going on. It's hard to tell when he'll understand just what happened. I hope he knows what a lil' fighter you are and you'll teach him to never give up, no matter what the odds are. You have blessed this world with your presence. Thank you for being a part of all our lives even if it was for a short while. Keep watch over  your mom and dad. They need to remember that you are always there for them. Keep watch over your big brother. Remind him each and every day that you're watching over him. I pray that your family will get through this with as much Strength as they have had throughout these past 3 months. Corbin, you are not gone. You are still here. I can only hope that you're watching over me and my family as well. Give your mom, dad, and brother a hug from me, ok? 

Lots of love,
Erica

Sorry I've been absent!!

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I hope to be keeping in touch more often. Things around here have been hectic and crazy!!

No energy.

Ugh!!! I have no energy today!! All day long I have not felt right. I even took a 3 hour nap (thank you kids!!!!) and still felt crappy. I did manage to get the dishes and some laundry done though, Go me!! Malachi is hitting the terrible two stage and all he did today was test me. He gets on the table, I tell him to get off, he gets off, then climbs back on, I pull him off, he gets back on, he gets sent to his room. AAHH!!! Guinevere is soo close to walking it's not even funny!! She stood by herself today for who knows how long clapping her hands. She wasn't balanced up against anything!!!! She has also started eating real food. Not baby food anymore!! I didn't think she would ever start eating it but she did the other day and now she's good to go!! We still have to wean her off the bottle but she is doing great! I wanna know how much longer this "terrible two" stage is gonna last. It is going to be the death of me...